Found and Lost

Left the studio in a hurry yesterday and some two hours later realized I had left my very expensive camera sitting in plain sight on a table visible through two large windows facing the public walkway. Did I lock the studio door? Too lazy to go back and fetch it so I worried about it all evening, went to get it first thing this morning but it wasn’t there. Came home and found it in the tote bag I had dropped on a table when I came home last night. Some important lessons here.

— You can’t see through a tote bag unless it is transparent. You have to open the top and look inside.

— I think of myself as a highly intelligent person but I do dumb things quite often. Completing the Times crossword prepares you for nothing.

— I would not be a good member of a survival team, would probably get the matches wet or something.

— I bought the camera about a year ago to begin on a profound and life-changing art project. I have taken about ten pictures on it and don’t know how to transfer any of them to my computer because I hate reading manuals. It’s a good thing I got it back so I can continue to move it to different places in the house and pretend I am important because I own such a cool camera.

— I can always sell it on ebay.

— There was a perfect picture of the camera in my mind, sitting in a certain spot on the table, with an arrow pointing to it saying “take this.” So, in a way, was the camera on the table? Didn’t Artistotle say something about that — or was it Schrodinger? Who the fuck cares.

— No, you won’t find what you need in your own back yard. I am not that stupid. It was inside the house.

— I spend too much time looking at pictures of Keanu Reeves on Instagram.

Hope this helps, a mistake is an opportunity for learning, yada yada. We are all doomed anyway because a good portion of the American population consists of gobshites. Have a good weekend!